I'm back now just for a short while. Don't think its a good to just type out all my variety of feelings here. It's best to keep it within me...before morons exploit them. I pray they'd be sent back to the depths of hell. Let them burn...

I've been on the brink of total break down recently to the extent that it was brought in to class. And some person just laughs off at my sorrows. Do other people's sorrows make one feel ecstatic? May be true to those who has a lost screw(s) in their head.

Sorry to SOME of my peeps for making you all feel much less happy on the last few days of which I was totally at the bottom of the pits. The shit had just hit the fan. Sorry to make you all so worried about me. Specially to Ms Chua, sorry for bringing some sadness in your class. What could I do? Give fake smiles? The impact of it was just too much for me to handle at that time. My capacity for holding back to the exposures of my feelings was overloaded. Well, I could have just punch someone. It just happens that I was quite good at bracing myself. I was incapacitated of laughter or even smiles. I guess my facial expression had gave way. But it was better rather than having me showing my full apathy or anger whatsoever...trust me, I'd have a much 'blacker' face than that...

Thanks to those who were concern about my condition. Seriously didn't think that you all would care at all. Now, I know better who my real friends are. For me now, its not those who are near, because they just appear to be that close, its the distant people who posses that EQ just enough to see the bitter part of my life. And I failed to turn up for the Geog meeting group last Saturday. Sorry...I seriously forgot about it. Didn't have any intention of making you all feel worried or what...there's nothing to worry about, my presence or absence wont' be of much difference. I have yet to establish myself as someone of much worth. D, PY, XQ, C, HaN, KS...thanks for trying to make me feel a bit better.

I wonder if this is the payabck that I'm suppose to receive...perhaps the right ones will be in the future times ahead? Hope so...

Love relationships have a lot of varieties, possibly like how unique our fingerprints are. There are so many types to it and the list just goes on. Love does a lot in changing people's lives and it has done very much since the birth of Adam and Eve.

Some may qustion what is really the feeling of love? But to me, that's a rather unfair question. It's the same as asking what is the true feeling of happiness. Similar to asking, what is sadness? The thing is, words can never really describe or represent what one's feelings are. The words attached to it acts as a link so that we human beings are able to relate to one another.

Love is one of the major factors that steers your life. It's like the weather, sometimes it allows you a smooth sail but at other times it just doesn't. Love can make one realize of the many things that life has to offer. It garners courage. It commands respect. It blows bliss. It stabs pain. There really is so much that love has done, will do, can do and so on. Love can be your saviour but it can be the cause of death too.

Love takes up a lot of forms. Different people show it differently. Some keep it to themselves while others proclaim. It takes alot to of courage to love. Partaking in it means opening the doors to happiness; and also the backdoor to which at times it escapes, sucked out by evil forces and what have them. Some just prefer to let their actions speak for them. It's more than words that means a lot.

More Than Words

Saying I love you,
Is not the words,
I want to hear from you,
It's not that I want you,
Not to say but if you only knew,
How easy, it would be to show me how you feel,

More than words,is all you have to do, to make it real,
Then you wouldn't have to say, that you love me,
I'd already know,

What would you do, if my heart was torn in two,
More than words to show you feel,
That your love for me is real,
What would you say, if I took those words away,

Then you couldn't make things new,
Just by saying I love you,

It's more than words,
It's more than what you say,
It's the things you do,oh yeah,
It's more than words,
It's more than what you say,
It's the things you do,oh yeah,

Now that I've tried to,talk to you and make you understand,
All you have to do, is close your eyes,
And just reach out your hands, and touch me,
Hold me close don't ever let me go,
More than words, is all I ever needed you to show,
Then you wouldn't have to say, that you love me,
Cause I'd already know,

...To them, silence speaks more.

It is sad to see how love traps people, sometimes causing them to lose their lives, careers and etc. It makes life more interesting to live in, to have to deal with all this stuff. It's one of the things that sums up the value of humanity. As much as we'd like love to bring happiness it has also the potential of throwing people into the pits. Many have died in the battles of love, literally and figuratively. Some lose their love ones forever. Lose it to others, lose it to circumstances and lose it to fate and destiny.

Incomplete

Empty spaces fill me up with holes
Distant faces with no place left to go
Without you within me I can’t find no rest
Where I’m going is anybody’s guess

I’ve tried to go on like I never knew you
I’m awake but my world is half asleep
I pray for this heart to be unbroken
But without you all I’m going to be is incomplete

Voices tell me I should carry on
But I am swimming in an ocean all alone
Baby, my baby It’s written on your face
You still wonder if we made a big mistake

I’ve tried to go on like I never knew you I’m awake but my world is half asleep I pray for this heart to be unbroken
But without you all I’m going to be is incomplete
I don’t mean to drag it on, but I can’t seem to let you go
I don’t want to make you face this world alone I want to let you go (alone)
I’ve tried to go on like I never knew you
I’m awake but my world is half asleep
I pray for this heart to be unbroken
But without you all I’m going to be is incomplete
Incomplete...

When this kinda a thing crosses your life, be brave and move on.

Love has triggered my mind to think of the many aspects of life. It shows both the beauty and horendous sight of it. I've no control in the outcome. But what I can do is to pick up from experiences and use it as guidance. It won't be of much help because people differs from one another. I've not regret since I've started on this journey. I do what I feel and know is right. Everything happens for a reason. Sometimes, it's just meant to be that way.

" Love, the magician, knows this little trick whereby two people walk in different directions yet always remain side by side. "