Going to gyrate about recent events...some sort of the week's review...brief events...and Friday was a bad day. Well, the day before was an excellent one? What can I say...C'est la vie...

I went for the usual night study I had been going to last night. Only that this time the group of people is of a different one. Well, they are mainly my old friends from Pri-sch... I can't deny that they do make a lot of noise. They are the type of Malay boys whom you see walking in the streets in groups. They are not the exterme ones. Just normal, happy-go-lucky kinda people. And they are very obstreperous even when doing work. Its very funny and entertaining to see the words they exchange with each other. All sorts of banter and 'terms' which you wouldn't know if you don't mix around with this people. The first sight of them gave me this thought, " Oh shit, nothing is going to come out of tonight's study session." Guess what? I was proven wrong. They may seem unruly, jumping around like monkeys and talking loudly to each other as if their ears are stuffed with inured ear wax but, work still goes on. We still talk about school life, Maths and what have you. From the outside, you may think that they are a bunch of useless nuts but no, they are not that bad. They are still concern over studies and they do something about it. If you are an outsider, you will be susceptible to making a misconception on them. Throughout the session, they had left me laughing in sticthes and it was less painful whilst I carry about doing my work. They form the lubricant to my process of study as they have made it more enjoyable. In my point of view, they have grown to maturity in a way of their own. A very unique way.

They also shared with me some things that were not brought to my attention due to the different circle of friends since we moved on to secondary school life. Since I study in a school relatively away from theirs, I had hardly met them these years. I had definitely miss out on a lot of stuff. Let me list down the things that we chatted about yesterday night.

- the love kinda stuff that they experience
- about some playgirl
- deragotary remarks made by schools
- about the guy who married 52 times
- the education they receive
- and about some ghost encounter

So yeah, that was what we mainly talk about. Apparently Fir had some ghostly experience the night before. He went to....with his friends and then he told us about this guy who is totally a moron or how Fir would put it, '' sakit wak". He is some big-shot guy who has zero deference at all. In other words, a troublemaker. According to Fir, this guy, during that night, went to these two trees and said some stupid stuff. Then the flock of them had taken a photo there and when they saw it in the digicam, there was something that wasn't suppose to be there.

It's been a while we sat down together and "bual-bual". So when it was close to 11, we decided to head for home. My house was the furthest and I had to walk home alone through the market or what we call "central". On my way home I saw black figures....well they are not ghosts...they are humans actually. Gee, didn't mean to be racist....

Well, shall round up this entry with a list of other happenings....

The Higher Malay Paper 2 was kinda bad for me. It was quite difficult and I think my distinction is at risk. I'll just pray that my Paper 1 can pull my grades up. And I slept for about half an hour during the paper..can't help it...was just too tired.

Got scolded by some aunty last Friday. Scolded me "sen chin ping"...like I don't know what it means. You're the one at fault and you still got the cheek to scold me. It was lucky that I was in school uniform or else, the likelihood of me spouting profanities would be much higher. I was already in a bad mood and that had to piss me off. Like icing on top of the cake, my mother scolding my sister top off the day which was full of heartaches. Haiz.... :(

Saturday was a bit better. At night I repainted my bike. The next day I took it for a spin. Rode all the way to JE Sports Complex and the turn back towards home. Maybe this Sunday, I'll pay the school a visit. I'm kinda happy that now my bike is at full tilt.

What else...had carried out a simple mission tihs morning. Even though I was succeful, I can't intepret for sure what "it" means...

Had a bad running nose this morning....sprinting at 100 km/hr...it was damn irritating...keep sneezing and sneezing...just hope that it won't be like that tomorrow...having english prelims....I think I'll surrender. I promise I won't take in too many cold drinks, chocalates and other stuff that will worsen my conditions. I will eat apples and drink plain water. *Hope tt works*

::: Let not you hatred of others cause you to act unjustly against them :::

Don't feel like typing much. Not because of anythign in particular. Anyway, I'll just note some brief events that filled in my recent days.

Yesterday yesterday's was my POP. Kinda late...anyway it was not much...not that good either but I did enjoy myself very much. It is most probably the last gathering for the 2002 intake of css ncc cadets so yeah it was very entertaining. Had fun beating up people into pulp and taking snaps of pictures...wonderful cake which took shape of a M-16 rifle...the gifts were cool too..and I feel very proud of the gold award that the unit had attained. NCC is going for a change...a bad one in my perspective...shall blog about it if I have the time...

oh yar...apparently something else happened in the beginning of the week...of which I cant remember....

then yesterday...rain and more rain..very nice weather...then went to some wedding thingy...at my old house....i mean the under the block function kinda thingy....whatever...and recalled the days when i first learn how to ride my bike there....nothing much then went home...

this evening i watched some parts of the national day rally..damn it..the PM speaks damn good malay...very very fluent for a non-malay..excellent stuff....and sort of inspired by his speech it seems Singaporeans are really working together hand in hand and I'm grateul that Singapore has such magnificent leaders....

then went to study with some friends...then there was this 2 cats which were about to fight and they sort of mew to each other only that it was not what i would call a cat mewing...it sounded very rough and not like a cat at all...it was more human...like moaning...very eerie...and since its the 7 th month on the chinese calendar...you get the rest of it...

So that's it..feel like I've missed out something...

Oh...I got to know her name. MH :)
if you know, shuddup.... :)

::: Ghosts = Devils :::

It was nice,
To have seen her smile.
Not going for more.
Focus.

Yesterday was so called a good day. Started off the morning well and it ended the same way too.
The Mother Tounge 'O' level results was out yesterday. I didn't get my results of course becasue I didn't even took the exam. So what has it got to do with me?

Well, I had actually helped this old friend of mine in his malay composition and he got an A2 for the paper. I didn't expect him to be so happy actually partly because I don't really think Malay is that difficult. Anyway, I didn't expect him to sms me yesterday night and thank me for my help. I mean, I really didn't do that much. The most that I gave was guidance. But there was this feeling of pride inside me, of helping others to get what they want. It may not be that significant but yes, I do feel good when I know I've aid to others and happily share the bit more that I have in the language. The feeling was really good even though his results would not really have any effect on me.

After the night study, I went home and to my surprise, I saw J on the bus. She was a classmate during my primary school years and she's also some sort of my neighbour. We talked quite a lot and I was glad because I managed to lessen my grief over certain things. One of the few friends whom I know will be there to support me when I fall.

Wheen I reached home, I got a call form my best friend and was sad to hear that he got C6 for the 'O' level paper I had mentioned earlier. So of course I advised him to re-take the paper and ya..he had made that decision. He sounded ok and told him that if he wants, I can help him willingly. He agreed and would contact me whenever he is ready to render my service. I don't know how much I can do, but hell yeah, I'm going to go through this with him. I'll do wahtever I can. That, is a promise.

Well, that's about all I guess. Need to get ready for school now. Hope its going to be a good day. Seeing her is not a requisite for a good day I guess...hahaz..if not I'll be in a hell lot of trouble. :)

Ohh yar...there's a change in the mission. How could I forget?

::: Friends Forever :::

Saw her today. (yesterday)

A consolation for a bad day.

Her face,
captured,
etched.

Can't stop it,
Inside.
But actions?
Full control.

Was that it?

Is she feeling what I'm feeling?

::: Human telepathy :::

This year's National Day seemed very different to me. Perhaps I've grown into maturity and yada yada yada...Didnt' really went out..just stayed at home and watched the NDP on the tube. It had been five years since they had it at the Padang...kinda cool

The aerial display is also kinda new...only if I could be a fighter pilot...anyway...it was cool...I will forever be enthralled by fighter jets...the way they are manouvered..so elegant and swift...like dancing in the air...

On the eve of National Day, I watched this Malay show potraying the life of Lt. Adnan. I find him to be a really great man and he is one of the few who inspires me to be a soldier one day. His bravery and sense of responsibility really sweeps me off my feet. I'll still salute him till the day i perish. I like the ending part of the show the best. It displays his sacrifice for his fellowmen despite being the highest ranking officer at the moment. I wondered what was going through his mind when he was in the trench firing off whatever that was left.

Like that wasn't enough, he went on to have arm to arm combat with the throngs of Japs coming towards him. It was lucid that he would die but he just kept on going. He did all these even though he was injured.

It is an honour to have such people defending Singapore even though its just a puny island. I do hope that Singapore still bears this kind of people. Surely we can't swell up the number of soldiers in the republic anymore, so I guess we have to resort to quality instead of quantity. Oh yeah, one more thing about Lt Adnan...it's believed that if there were to be 10 more like him the Japs would've need 10 more divisions to occupy Malaya.

In the years to come if I were to be an officer, this is the creed that I will hold on to,

"As a leader, I myself would not only excel, but to also ensure that my men have exceeded the boundaries of their potential. Together, each and everyone of us will be the best we can be."

Hope that I'll realise my dreams one day...

A heap of gratitude, respect and honour

To Lt Adnan and his Malay Regiment
To those who have survived the perils and hells of war
To those who have shed blood for the homeland
And to those who have one way or another done their best to make this island a better palce to live in.

This is a song dedicated to those warriors who have and will defend this country.

Di medan ini
by Awie.

Di medan ini zahirku layu
Jasad kaku dibelenggu
Jalur nadi masih kukuh
Janji setia tidak luntur

Di medan ini bakti disandang
Korbanku untuk maruah
Teguhkan azam nusa
Agar generasiku terbela

Jejakku tinggalkan
Untuk kau teruskan
Bangkitkanku dalam perjuanganmu
Mencantas noda
Bara semangatku
Bara semangatmu
Merintis cinta

Di medan ini gemilang persada
Hamparkan jati diri
Gemparkan pada mereka
Kita mampu teguhkan
Lambang merdeka

Laungkan semboyan
Seru gempur perwira
Walau gugur kubasahkan darah
Dengan ikhlas
Sumpah hidup wira bangsa

Juangkan cita
Bebaskan nusa

::: Death Before Dishonour :::

So here's the poem as promised...

The Flame

Crypt of love
The flame ignited
Small and flickering
Swaying with hope...

But...

With summoned courage,
With wrenching pain,
With perpetual tears,
In strands,
In chains,
of glisteing tears.
Trickling down,
No ending.
No respite.
As I die...

Drawing the flame close,
But remains...
As vestigial.

With a motion so slow.
As if seconds were sliced.
As if hands swept in reverse.
Fighting back within myself.
Fighting to lose.

Fingers craned,
Curled and cranked.
Like ravenous serpents,
On prey.

The gust come together,
Falling in, foot soldiers,
Marching in flows.
With suspension of solemn notes.

Footprints of sorrow.
As it climbs.
Smoothly it goes.
Up and through.
And out it goes...

Swallowing.
Devouring.
The swaying flame.

Yeah...so that's it...and I'll try not to have any more of these sad kinda posts...muz make an effort to enjoy life...Natinal Day coming up...lets honour the effort of our forefathers...

::: Taking responsibility :::

Had x-country yesterday...didn't really know what happened to me...got the last medal there is...definitely not one of my best runs...anyway..its over...so here's a list of my x-country medals from the 4 years in CSS...

Sec 1 : 11th

Sec 2 : 17th

Sec 3 : 12th

Sec 4 : 20th

And like last year...4/3 won the champion class again...the atmosphere was kinda great at the carpark when they announced it...but somehow I don't think the whole school is happy with us...

After that, abt half of the class went to eat at Koufu at westmall...walk and walk and walk until rjc der den decided to take bus to the bishan mrt station...rjc building really overwhelmed me...its god damn big and it's so damn cool...so den take the mrt and finally reached bb. Oh yar..at bishan mrt station i dunno wad happened to me...suddenly i become mischevious and i did something kinda dangerous until the mrt people gave out a horn...haahaz...ok that was like overboard..tt muz b bcuz im overbored....

den at the food court me n thomas was so darn shocked to the gills when we found out that some sausages actually costs abt $2 !!!!! what the hell lor..and the nasi lemak is 3 bucks...might as well pay one dollar more and get two plates of nasi lemak...kuku stall..hahahz...

lets' see wad other happy stuff der is...

got my coldplay cd...the songs are damn nice..

then...borrowed some good books..shall read them later...

almost finishing my physics worksheets...

saw some ''girlfriends'' yesterday...R1 and stuff...

oh yar and some kuku person paint his hayabusa bike like *toot*...the colours are so unmatching...ewww...

ok...now going for the downslide...u might not want to scroll down as the following will not be a happy yaya papaya kinda thingy...so dun blame me if you feel lousy after reading this...

You sure u wanna read?

Are you?

Sure?

No regrets?

Very very certain?

God damn certain?

Wholeheartedly sure?

Is "yes" ur final answer?

Oh well fine..i'll just get on to it...

after a while...i have managed to consolidate my thoughts..and yeah...life's getting kinda cool now...im just waiting to leave sec sch now... with mch force i've succesfully focus my vision into a smaller scope...concentrate on lesser stuff...cutting off others...like relationships and stuff...cuz find them a pain in the ass for now...juz going to do whatever there is to get to my dreams..and stuff....oh yar..and i've decided to go for CLT course but Mr F said the prelims results will be taken into consideration and to me tt kinda sux...prelims is like in less than 4 weeks??!! Anyway...yeah going to do the best I can in whatever i'm involved in...no more half past six work and stuff...

last thursday it rained like hell during my mt-free period...while others are celebrating the huge downpour, I was drowning myself with this song...

Coldplay

Fix You

When you try your best but you don't succeed

When you get what you want but not what you need

When you feel so tired but you can't sleep

Stuck in reverse

When the tears come streaming down your face

When you lose something you can't replace

When you love someone but it goes to waste

could it be worse?

Lights will guide you homeand ignite your bones

And I will try to fix you

High up above or down below

when you're too in love to let it go

If you never try you'll never know

Just what you're worth

Lights will guide you home

and ignite your bones

And I will try to fix you

Tears stream down your face

When you lose something you cannot replace

Tears stream down your face and I

Tears stream down your face

I promise you I will learn from my mistakes

Tears stream down your face and I

Lights will guide you home

And ignite your bones

And I will try to fix you

And suddenly got the pang of inspiration to write poem for a someone...who's kinda far away...

Nvm..shall put up the poem on the next post...

::: Marching on head up :::