Supposed to write this entry days ago but my com won't allow it so here it is...I'll place it in this entry...

Oh yeah..by the way, thanks Kang Sheng for the help..reagrding the com..

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Frankly speaking, I don't know what to say or rather...do..about us...

I don't even know if its getting worse on my side...because my brain seems to shut off.

I don't know how to weave the state I'm in now into words..perfectly..

It seems taht I want you so very much but...i can't see how i can do it 'directly'...

It has become a labyrinth...and i have to go round and round ...in order to get to you..

Even then, its not easy..because in those tunnels of maze...lies a number of monsters...big ones..small ones...ugly ones...

I have a direction in life now..thanks to you...

I've come out with a motley set of permutations...and I'm preparing to face them.

I feel rather guilty for having to resort to this treatment. For having to "put you away" for the moment..physically I suppose...

Just to let you know...I'm tied between my responsibilities-cum-dreams and ..you.

I admit it that it's my fault..for not doing well in my studies...and so now...I'm left wth not much of an option...

But to create the distance...around me...

It's painful for me..and perhaps for u too...especially when you don't deserve this...

I'm sorry...

For putting you in this mess...my mess...

For treating you this way...

Don't take it that I'm blinding myself from you...rather..its more to the other end...

"You are in the middle of the crowd.Perhaps looking around or me...but to no vail. I'm somewhere in there...blended into others..making myself invisible. I can see you...but you can't see me."

Sorry..for any discomfort or grieve thatI've caused...

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Nearly got into another accident couple of days ago..I was verly lucky...I was going to school when I nearly got knocked down by this big motorbike...the sport tourer kind i think...one more second faster and I'll be gone...like one wasn't enough for the day...I got the second one...I was crossing the road with Wilson when the green man was on...then i glanced to the left and saw this approacching car...it don't seem like it wanted to stop and I started to feel uneasy...upon impulse I slowed my walking pace with Wilson doing the same... and true enough the car over short..it screeched to a halt...and we were taken aback... kinda scary...2 in a day... could have been worse....

::: Forgive me and accept it...will you? :::